Corrupt Offers

Spunky Sock: STD01 - Do you enjoy to do it with ladies? Well so does Mr. Kane. But they won't let him. He does however, enjoy the ocassional wank. To prove this he is now marketing a line in sperm covered items. The tissues have been stained a pleasing yellow umber, and, as with all of our products, they come with the following cast iron guarantee....DIRECT FROM THE COCK OF KANE.

Piss Catalogue Number: piss 01 - Many of you have written saying how much you love Phil, and how much you want to touch him. Regrettably, due to a particularly noxious skin condition, Mr. Kane, despite his protestations, is not allowed physical contact with others. We are however, delighted to offer a "once-in-a-lifetime" opportunity to purchase his piss.

The formula is simple. You send us the meagre sum of five pounds, (payable by cheque to P Beadle), we send you an Evian bottle filled to the brim with genuine Philip Kane piss. These are spill proof, (In as far as this is possible)., and come with the cast iron guarantee that the contents come direct from the cock of the finest white soul singer of his generation.

What are you waiting for?

£5.00 inc P & P

Shit in a Container Catalogue Number: shit 02
As above only of course, as the packaging can be unreliable, a slightly more risky investment.

£20.00 (non-refundable)

Spunk in a test tube
Offer withdrawn due to unreliability of supply

Future Offers
Hair Tank Tops
Media Gurls Pig mask
Dress 'im up Philip Kane dolly himbo
Inflatable Philip Kanes